The Ancestors Bring Me Home...

I live in a little white cottage in England’s Lake District, a stunning National Park in the Northwest of the country. Situated half way up and half way down a hillside it looks out onto views of the Yewdale valley and to the fells (the Lake District name for mountains) on the other side. Surrounded by fields and ancient woodland, it’s nothing short of idyllic.

I had dreamed of living in a place like this for at least twenty years, a place in the countryside that I could use for healing work and growing my own food, but a nasty divorce left my financial situation in tatters and cut that dream off at the knees…or so I thought!

After 2 years of being a bit lost followed by a 13 Moon Ancestral Pilgrimage around Britain and Ireland the time came to put down stable roots and find a new home. Somewhere I could finally settle and begin the menopausal chapter of my life. Given I could no longer afford to buy a place I started to look for somewhere to rent. I had no idea just how competitive the rental market was and after a couple of months of dead-end searching, lock-down happened! I had no choice but to resign myself to the fact that a temporary stay at my Mum’s was going to be a little longer than I had planned.

And then for some magic! Whilst the world came to a stop with me stuck back in my childhood home doing my best not to go mad, things in the unseen realms continued to function. The stars were aligning as the saying goes, and whilst it was difficult to see that at the time, now in hindsight it’s as clear as day. As lockdown lifted, the magic happened, and here I am, living in the most beautiful place on earth where that big old dream really has now come true. Some may call it manifestation, law of attraction or synchronicity, but for me it was Ancestor intervention! I have no doubt they guided me here…and for reasons that are still unfolding.

Built in 1620 it is most definitely an ancestral home with old flag stone floors, exposed beams and original oak panelled walls. Part of Beatrix Potter’s estate, it is now owned by the National Trust, making me the current guardian of a little piece of our shared heritage. Four years on and I still have to pinch myself on a regular basis just to check that it really is real and I do actually live here. I feel so unbelievably blessed that it sometimes hurts my heart.

The Original Religion

Walking the ancestral path for 10 years or so now, the Ancestors along with Nature have become my “religion” (often known as animism) - the spiritual belief system which guides my life and connects me to that “something bigger than me” thing - which some call the Universe, God, Source or the Great Mystery. After a pretty long inner search to find some kind of meaningful spiritual connection, it was discovering my ancestors that ultimately provided the missing keys.

Other ancient cultures initially signposted the way for me. Indigenous peoples have always honoured their ancestors as part of daily life; think of the Native Americans, the Māori's, or the Taoists for example. For thousands of years, people have known that the ancestors play a vital role in life. Intrinsically interwoven into their spiritual belief systems, indigenous peoples see no separation, no endings and no beginnings between the living and the dead. For them, the ancestors are the roots of the tree of life enabling the continuation of human survival.

Ancestral reverence was perhaps the earliest “religion” there was. Indigenous cultures not only honour the ancestors, but also seek guidance from them. The indigenous peoples of Britain and Ireland were no exception. We only have to look to the neolithic burial chambers to know this. With the arrival of the Romans and the introduction of Christianity however, belief systems changed and the place of ancestors faded into the background, often replaced by saints.

It’s not hard to see that our modern culture has severely gone of track. Given the mental health crisis amongst so many others, it’s pretty obvious that we’ve lost our way. Without ancestral connection we have forgotten who we are and why we are here. The questions is, are we too late to save ourselves?

Whilst the chaos and suffering in the world can easily tip me into the pit of despair, in my heart of hearts I also know we are right where we’re meant to be on our evolutionary journey, and that we can and will find our way through. I also know that ancestral connection is a linchpin to our future direction and it is comforting to see it making its way back into our healing work and spiritual belief systems here in Western culture.

A Journey of Transformation

I know from my own journey that walking with the ancestors can be a life-changing experience that brings so many unexpected surprises along the way. Behind us stand literally thousands of them, people who lived here on earth before us, people from whom we have come into physical being and owe our lives. Our ancestors may be dead, but they are still with us, both in spirit form, in our bodies through the inherited aspects of our DNA, and importantly in the collective field that shapes our culture and traditions. Through reconnecting with and working with our ancestors we uncover many buried treasures.

I have received profound healing through ancestral work along with a solid anchor for my life’s purpose. Through following the ancestral threads I have learned so much about myself, about life and about humanity. It has been an educational process weaving history, geography, theology, psychology, science and spirituality which continues to inspire and inform my life and my work.

Whilst the journey is always a unique and individual one, from all the women I have worked with I have noticed a number of themes that often arise:

• A deeper sense of belonging - to places, to ourselves, to each other
• A profound sense of support and holding as we journey through life
• The claiming of our birth right to be here on this earth and to live our full potential
• Permission to “take up space” and fearlessly express our authentic selves
• The context for our lives that we may have felt was missing before
• Total clarity on our life's purpose or mission
• Specific skills, talents and strengths inherited from the family line
• A renewed connection to the sacredness of all of life
• Increased humility, empathy, and love for ourselves and others
• A strong need to protect and take care of what we love as home

Experiencing just one of these things can transform a life. Ancestral work changes us from the inside out and helps us realise that we find the power, the joy, the direction, the success or whatever else it is we think we want, when we go within. As Carl Jung said, “he who looks outside dreams, he who looks within awakens.” The ancestors will always take us within and challenge our thoughts, feelings, perceptions and beliefs. For many people, connecting with ancestors conjures up the world of psychic mediums and contacting those recently crossed over. Whilst it can include that, it is so very much more.

Where to begin?

One of the questions I get asked a lot is, “how do you do it? Where do you start?” My answer is generally along the lines of slow down and start listening. The Ancestors will come to your door when you’re ready, and there is no specific route map to take or right or wrong way to do it.

For me, they first arrived back in 2012 when I began a Vision Quest training. Back then I had never really thought about ancestors. Little did I know, that was about to change, and change on the very first day during the 2 hour Medicine Walk we were guided to take from a cosy cottage nestled within the South Downs National Park.

If you’ve never done a Medicine Walk before, they are powerful experiences in which we find guidance, insights and wisdom through the mirror of nature. As I wandered down the road on that cold autumn day seeking answers to my life’s purpose, I found myself called into the old village church.

As I walked up the path the church itself seemed to disappear, and my attention was pulled by the gravestones that encircled it. They seemed to come alive in a beautiful dance and I couldn’t help but follow them. There were some really old ones dating back to the 1700s, and then all the way through to more recent ones of that very year.

Their dance led me to a rather imposing avenue of graves. About fifty headstones left and right stood straight and upright like soldiers on parade and beckoned me down the middle to a bench seat that seemed to be waiting for me at the far end. As I slowly walked with a bit of trepidation, everything about death evaporated and I felt the aliveness of all those people buried there. I felt welcomed and seen, supported somehow, like they’d been expecting me and were jubilant at my arrival. The word ANCESTORS played over and over in my head, a word I had never really connected to before that.

As I mindfully made my way towards the bench, honouring each gravestone and life as I passed it, there was one that drew my particular attention and called me closer. On it was written the usual name and dates of birth and death and then in big letters, “SHE LIVED HER LIFE IN SERVICE”.

As I reached the bench and sat there for a while, hanging out with dead people, I couldn’t help but notice how alive, seen and held I felt. I didn’t realise it at the time but fast forward 13 years and I now see that this experience was showing me my life’s direction and purpose in the most simple yet profound way. It would be another 4 years until I’d consciously begin to follow the Ancestral Path (hence the need for deep listening!) but since then, it has been working with ancestral medicine that has really helped me heal some of my own pretty deep wounds.

Ancestral Connection Matters

The ancestral journey took me out from the individual to the collective level of healing. It revealed that my pain wasn’t mine alone—it was part of a greater story passed down through the generations. By connecting with my ancestors, I was able to understand the circumstances of my life through a wider lens which helped me reclaim a more positive and stronger sense of myself and heal wounds that had held me back my whole life.

Ancestral healing is where ancient wisdom meets modern science. With discoveries in epigenetics and inherited trauma, we are understanding more and more about how deeply we are affected by our ancestral lineages —and how much potential lies in healing it.

Our Ancestors lived through unimaginable hardships: war, displacement, persecution and poverty. We have descended from lineages traumatised by violence, abandonment, and powerlessness, from people who often struggled just to survive. We have inherited their fear-based survival mechanisms which have become deeply rooted into the psyche of humanity itself, and continue to play out through the collective unconscious.

Today we can see that these survival strategies, necessary for our ancestors, are for us, not simply out-dated, but are life-destructive. Our inherited behavioural patterns of separation (from ourselves, from each other and from the land) are making us sick and are causing untold planetary destruction. And we have a choice; to struggle on towards our own demise, or to bravely go within and face our inherited wounds to heal what is harming us.

Are you hearing the call of the Ancestors too?

If your answer is yes and you’d like some help to get started or to deepen into the work I always recommend forging your relationship with them. The best place to start is always through curious connection, remembering that the ancestors aren’t just the recently departed members of our families, but go way back through the lineages to ancient times. Awakening to our ancestral wisdom takes us on a journey through history and heritage and can be a beautiful path to walk - it isn’t all about the pain and sorrow.

In my 40 page illustrated Guide, “Return to the Ancestral Altar” I share some more of the magic I've experienced on my own ancestral journey and some of my favourite practices for bringing the ancestors into your everyday life. In it, you’ll learn more about why your ancestors matter and how they shape your life, as well as 13 transformative ways to build a meaningful relationship with them. Whether you’re just beginning or already walking the Ancestral path, this Guide is designed to inspire and deepen your journey. You can find it here.

If you're feeling a bit lost, disconnected, anxious, in need of something you can't quite put your finger on, I know your ancestors can help you. And what is more, they love it when we find our way back to them and are very happy to step up to be our spiritual cheer-leaders if we let them! Open your life to them and I know you'll discover that you are stronger, wiser, more creative, more talented, more courageous, more resilient (insert your own word) than you realised...as well as a profound sense of love that really can change your life. 

"We must turn to the past in order to write the future.” – Victor Hugo

So from my little magical cottage built 400 years ago by artisans of the past, thank you for reading my words. I wish you a fruitful journey as you walk your own Ancestral Path and invite you to contact me if you want or need further support or guidance.

May we all walk in beauty and be good ancestors,

Cali White x
www.thewitcheshouse.org